my two cents on fashion

a person isn't shallow simply because they enjoy fashion and dress well. i think it depends on the individual. you could have two people wearing the exact same trendy outfit and they could be having totally different attitudes about what they are wearing. one might be arrogant and want everyone to take notice while the other person simply saw the outfit and thought it was nice. it's wrong for the fashionable people to pass judgement on those that don't keep up with the latest trends, are poor, or don't know how to match. however, it also wrong for those that could care less about fashion (or can't afford nice things) to judge the people who enjoy shopping for clothes and wearing the latest styles. both the people who "dress for success" and the people who could care less are arrogant and shallow when they have a judgemental attitude.

let's face it - whether we like it or not, people do judge by appearances. i think we've all done it. i know i have. i think sometimes it is necessary and other times, it is flat out wrong. for example, i am more likely to hire a clean cut female teenager to watch my children than some 40 year old male biker. it is possible that the biker might be a better babysitter than the nice-looking teenage girl, but hey - we do often go by impressions, don't we?

as parents, wouldn't we be more leery of our children hanging out with the kids that have tattoos and wear black all the time - as opposed to the kids that dress modestly and seem well-behaved? what we wear does send messages, whether we like it or not.

there was a girl i went to high school with that had a really bad reputation. she wore suggestive clothing and had a large chest. guys were always around her. i, like everyone else, thought she was "easy." well, i ended up in a class with her later on, and i got to know her. she was a total virgin. her appearance said otherwise.

i also knew a guy that dressed pretty strange. he was a loner. he wore combat boots, fish net stockings, had piercings, wore eyeliner, and had a crazy red mohawk. everyone had their assumptions about him. he was a bad guy, he was looney, he was scary. well, i had the opportunity to get to know him as well and he was the sweetest guy. he was quiet, talented, and kind. who'd have thought? his clothing didn't seem to say that.

in the lds Church, our missionaries are clean cut and modest. missionaries come from all walks of life. they listen to different kinds of music and have different personal styles. so why is it that they are out serving, they all look alike? they are representing the Lord! i wonder how many would still be drawn to the gospel if our missionaries dressed in their own personal styles and no rules applied?

we may say we should be able to dress however we like and not be judged whatsoever, but that is arrogant and unrealistic. i say it is arrogant because many people seem to automatically assume they are being judged. it's like they already have a chip on their shoulder when it comes to fashion. they are irritated that people judge and yet they themselves are passing their own kind of judgement. it's really interesting to me.

i've known some people who were less popular in school, some poor and some simply didn't have any fashion sense. a few of these people have such an extreme dislike for fashion because there is pain in their school years that relates to this. they might remember being judged harshly and treated badly by the popular, rich kids...and so they go into adulthood with a massive chip on their shoulder, as if fashion is to blame. but it's not fashion - it's those individuals that were wrong. just because someone grew up poor does not automatically make others wrong for enjoying shopping for clothes and dressing well. that's ridiculous!

there is that popular phrase stating that "clothes makes the man." however, an excellent point has been made, that the Savior of the world was expected by many to come in fine clothing that a king would be expected to wear. however, He arrived in apparel most humble. but we can also read about wealthy men who dressed very fine, and were righteous men. no, it doesn't matter what is on the outside. after all, you can't take it with you, right?

everyone has their own ideas about what it attractive. to me, a clean cut man who dresses "GQ" commands attention. this doesn't mean the guy is a good guy, true. but what if there is a really good man who also dresses well? what a catch, i say!! now, i would much rather be with a good man that was fashion-challenged than the GQ jerk. absolutely!! i want lasting qualities...the whole eternal package! and if he allows me to help him dress in a way that enhances how handsome he already is, that is awesome!

perception can be frustrating and even far from the truth, but it's there. and there is nothing wrong with having some fashion sense. what's the matter with learning how to match and dressing for one's body type? nothing!! there is no arrogance in it, unless the individual is arrogant. i think this subject can be argued well on both sides. first impressions are real but we also need to get to know people. my brain is all over the place right now, so i feel like this is the most disorganized blog ever. oh well. this fashion topic was bugging me so i wanted to get it out of my head so i can better enjoy my evening. *smile*

me? i love to shop for clothes. i like my children to wear cute outfits. i know that kids can be cruel. i am not going to dress them poorly just to prove a point. i want my children to be stylish but also modest. i want them to have good fashion sense. i have been trying to teach my daughter how to match colors and styles. i am not going to send her off to school in some strange outfit when i know that kids can be insensitive. i want her to focus on her education. i think the kids that dress strangely might have a more difficult time concentrating in school if kids give them a hard time.

i also enjoy buying clothes for myself. this is actually a new thing. i have wanted to get a whole new wardrobe because all the clothes in my closest had been purchased by my soon-to-be-ex-husband. i guess you could say my clothes shopping was symbolic. anyway, putting on new clothes can feel really great. i don't think it should be a crutch - meaning, clothes should not always determine one's happiness. but i do think that dressing nice can help put a little bounce in someone's step.

i remember reading an article a long time ago about a battered woman's shelter. many of these women and their children were poor and wore old, mis-matched clothing. they gave these women a chance to get brand new clothes for themselves and their children. they also gave them makeovers. this really boosted their self confidence! i think it is wonderful when people dress in such a way that helps them feel good about themselves and feel happy.

if i am wearing some sloppy outfit, have no makeup on and my hair is not done, i definitely feel differently than if i was wearing a nice outfit, i was having a good hair day and my makeup looked nice. i don't think there is anything wrong with that.

well, enough of this. i have plans tonight!!