light bulb moment

i've struggled on and off with a certain relationship, for quite a long time. sometimes i feel close to my friend, sometimes i feel like i'm in a galaxy far, far away from her. some days, i'll feel like her best friend, and other days i'll feel like she has completely forgotten that i exist. i've had to remind myself that this relationship will never be what i wish it would be. the reason for my misery? my own unmet expectations. and isn't that the way it is, with most anyone or anything? if we have expectations and those expectations are not met, we suffer inside. it's our very own self-created world of pain.

so the light bulb goes on.... don't have expectations!!

{okay, so i am bleeping this part out to explain myself. i wrote this about ME. it didn't come off that way. i think i am going to rewrite this after much thought....and make it more about what i intended, which would be my own sensitivities and how i cause disappointment in my own life for no one's fault other than my own. so, to be continued....in an entirely different way....}